J Martins - Cool Temper (Hot Naija!)

A New Year

Happy New Year everyone! Like the saying goes, better late than never but honestly don't know where the end of 2010 went and now it's the end of January!Christmas was great. After 18 years of living without winter, it was great to experience the cold, snow flurries, chilly winds etc. all over again. I have always loved the snow and I was in seventh heaven being back in it. My son whose first winter this was, loved it also. From our house, we had a lovely view of the Jura mountains and each day it was fun to see more snow settling on the peaks. Other times, it was just covered in low hanging clouds.

New Year's day was even better. An old friend whom I had recently gotten back in touch with before travelling came to spend New Year's eve and day with us. Was really good catching up and talking about old times back in the early 80's. I don't know what it is about being on the cusp of a new year but one somehow gets nostalgic about the past, though at the same time, looks forward to what the new year will bring.

So far January has started well with lots of prospects and I hope this can be the trend for the next few months to come. If you don't stick to your resolutions, don't worry just try and do what you can.

Have a wonderful new year.

Gratitude

What are you grateful for? Have you thought about making a list of the things that you are grateful for? In our busy lives, we tend to forget to take a moment each day and be thankful for both the little and big things that occurred in our day.

Start something new, make a list of all the things that you are grateful for each day, and see how that makes you feel. I can assure you, it will give you such a sense of gratification, you will be amazed.

I started my gratitude list today and was surprised at how many things I was able to list. One of the main things I am grateful for is having this blog. It has given me the ability to speak my mind and for that I am grateful. I know it's been hard to keep it going but from today, I am going to make a conscious effort to write something everyday.

Start yours today and let's hear how it made you feel.

Social Networks - The Good and the Bad

Social networks are the 'in-thing' these days. There are three social networks I belong to; two for business and one for my personal use.I have been a member of Facebook, the social network going places, for almost 4 years. At the time I joined, I was wondering if I was doing the right thing as one puts their pictures and basically their life out there for close friends to see.

For me it has been a great experience and I love it to bits! I have reconnected with people from college whom I thought I would never see again. It has also given me the opportunity to promote my business and at least people get to know what I do...

However with everything, there is the bad side to it. Some people who have bad intentions are hacking into accounts, sending out false information about great deals and it was reported in the papers the other day that a chap had used a female member's picture and name from Facebook, to apply for the USA visa lottery. She received an email telling her that she had been successful in the visa lottery and she became suspicious as she had not applied. To cut a long story short, she reported the matter to the police and two people were nabbed!

On numerous occasions, I have been able to look at pictures of members whom I have not yet connected with and some people have had their profile pictures used in adverts on the network.I know they have to check their privacy settings, but it does give you a creepy feeling knowing someone can check out your pictures without necessarily connecting with you.

A week ago, a friend made a comment on my page and two hours later, the comment had been removed...by whom, we still do not know. I put a message on my status stating I did not appreciate comments on my page being removed, and 10 minutes later, the comment reappeared! My friend has since then changed his password thrice and keeps getting attacks on his laptop from weird countries. He's a computer engineer and knows how to trace these things.

So do watch out on those networks but have fun too and don't go adding people you don't know.

It's all about having faith!

It's been a trying couple of weeks...just thankful that all the worrying and fear is over. What do you do when a loved one goes missing? Especially when the individual is high profile and it cannot be put out on the airwaves? Well that's the situation I found myself in a few weeks ago when someone close to me did just that....it was like I was watching a feature film because the events were just incredible! All the worry, loss of appetite, you name it, I went through it.

I even did some P.I.work myself...travelling down the road that goes right to the Togo border and stopping at each police barrier, making enquiries, showing a photograph of the missing person with the hope that someone will spot this person. The trip was a good one, especially as I had not been to the border we share with Togo for yonks! However I was not there for the sight seeing...but I tell you that trip made me realise how under-utilised the Volta River is.

As soon as I alighted from the vehicle, a young boy started speaking to me in French, asking whether I wanted to change some money. I replied that I didn't, then he started to ask if I needed accomodation, this time I stoppped in my tracks and told him to back off....I was on a mission and didn't need people distracting the purpose of this trip! It does pay to speak the lingo (French I mean) because you will never know when one might need to get out of a jam. Anyway I am digressing..unfortunately my trip did not attain the results I was looking for so all I could do was to leave my contact details and the photography behind.

One of the policemen who took my number at one of the barrier posts, called me a few times before I got back to Accra and I was not pleased because I know he was not calling to give me good news but for personal reasons. The same policeman called me the following morning and I had to tell him where to get off....sexual harrassment is not what I needed at that time of the morning (or at any time for that matter).

An sms from a strange number brought good news! My missing person had been spotted west of Accra. I was told to get there quickly but as I was waiting for my car to return from the fitting shop, I called a close friend of mine to tell him the good news and he offered to go and pick up my missing person. After all the worry and anguish I thought I was ready for this but my hands started to shake so badly, I could hardly dial numbers on my mobile phone.

A number of people still ask how I was able to stay calm during the entire period and I answered it was my faith that kept me going. All's well that ends well.

Tribute to Michael Jackson

Been a while since I wrote anything and there's been a lot on my mind. Still trying to come to terms with the fact that MJ is no longer with us. He made me feel Bad and Dangerous...almost like a Smooth Criminal and that was totally Off the Wall. However, Looking Through the Window, it made me want to Scream but then again, I was just a Stranger in Moscow.

Just been rhyming like this for the last month and don't think it's going to stop...on the contrary I Want to get something Started but after looking at the Man in the Mirror, I will Remember the Time, it was Human Nature and Ebony & Ivory were a Thriller.

I grew up to the music of the Jackson 5 and later when Michael strived out on his own bought each album that he realeased. Even got my son hooked on all his music and taught him how to do the Moonwalk (yes I used to be a dancer many decades ago) and still have all the moves.

Rest in peace MJ you worked Day and Night, tried to Heal the World and got my dance crew call me PYT.

MJ, Gone Too Soon.

Polygamy

Polygamy is still practised in Africa, parts of the Middle East and some other places. However I am tackling this from the African perspective and how it is still popular in our society. I was asked a question yesterday about if I would like to be in a polygamous relationship. I giggled when asked this and confessed to the person (whom I shall refer to as Nana) that if I had been asked that question twenty years ago, I would have said no and that would have been the end of it. However these days, I was ready to listen to one's reason for taking that path. He proceeded to explain why he was asking me the question, though it sounded like he was either contemplating it, or was trying to see if it would be considered "cool" seeing as he is a celebrity, or wanted my response as a test. Still not clear why he asked me and we shall be having a second discussion next week.

These days my interactions with a number of polygamous families has given me an insight as to how these families do thrive. Do not misunderstand me, I do not discriminate between monogamous relationships or polygamous ones or choose my friends based on what type of relationship they were procreated from. Everyone is welcome to be my friend. It is only that in the last decade or so, I have had the opportunity to really see how a polygamous relationship works as I have been linked to few families who still embrace this type of relationship. I marvel at the way the 'wives' all seem to get along as well as the children. Back in the UK in the late eighties during my student days, I will never forget the night a close friend of mine, jumped on the tube armed with a box of Kleenex Men's tissues, ended up ringing the doorbell to my flat like a mad woman, only for her to announce that she had just found out her father had some other children. We were both in shock and felt that her Dad had betrayed ALL of us. These days that sort of news is not shocking anymore.

I happen to know a gentleman who has a number of wives (I am still not quite sure of the number) who shares his week among the wives. For example from Sunday to Tuesday he can be found at house A, from Wednesday to Thursday house B and so on. I do not know how he does it, especially as he is not quite as young as he used to be.

What I would like to know about polygamy, especially from the men, is, why does one have so many women or is it that one cannot find the one woman with the most qualities, hence the different choices? Or is it that given the shortage of men, one is trying to make up for it, hence giving the ladies a chance? I would really like to hear from you gents out there.

I still have not answered the question I was asked yesterday and still debating if I should. Quite frankly I am not the type to share so at least you know what my answer is going to be......